Friday, May 31, 2013

Don't be driven by fear

Fear can be debilitating. This past week there has been many times where I have felt this feeling or state if mind. When I think about moving to Guatemala there are many thoughts that pop in my head: finances, leaving my family, am I capable of dealing with other's distress, will God use me, health, etc. the list just goes on and on. One thing that was a bit of a barrier was expressing to my parents my interest for moving to Guatemala. I have mentioned it, but never to the extent where it seemed solid. I finally had that conversation the other day. It went well, but there was sadness in my dad's eyes. I'm an adult and have been somewhat independent for many years. I guess I will always be their "niƱa". 

I am working a lot of hours and even picked up some extra hours a few weekends each month since a co-worker is on medical leave. I am paying off what I owe to make the move permanent. I know that there's a lot of work to still be done and in order to make the move sooner than 3 years from now (when I will be completely done with paying things off) I will have to fundraise. I  am super grateful for my friends who want to help me with this. Typically, asking for help is not my forte and God is always taking out of my comfort zone to show me his intense power. He can do "immeasurably more". Trust and obedience is what He is teaching me. 

I acknowledge the fear, I know that it's there and I have choices; let the fears debilitate me or trust in God's will and allow him to guide me through it.